These are some pictures Joy posted recently on Facebook. She took them in late October, three years ago, at what turned out to be the last family outing of our “normal” life. Within a few days, we got the call to pull Jen out of school and bring her to the emergency room at Westchester Medical Center.

Halloween is difficult, because it calls to mind this pumpkin picking excursion, and also because it was one of Jen’s favorite holidays. The following year, Halloween 2014, she was about 7 weeks into her bone marrow transplant and was feeling miserable. But she rallied enough to put on a spooky wig and makeup, and to wear a huge fake spider on her forehead. She posted the resulting selfie on Facebook (of course) as if to thumb her nose at her disease, insistent on being the person she was.

Happy Halloween Jennie. It’s not the same without you.